kay poh-ing around in NY ::

babe, for you:

i don't understand how this thing works. to me, if the brightness of a light bulb can determine the strength of your relationship on the scale of 1-10, your brightness is around 3 i think. the other side of the tungsten is faulty le. sometimes work, sometimes don't work. the most [i was comtemplating to put a middle finger, but thought my blog should be as PG as possible] infuriating (?) thing is.. sometimes this wire goes somewhere else in the circuit to hook some other light bulbs up.

i think you should start finding better quality wires and get yourself an energy saving lamp, makes sure the light bulb helps you in your studies. if its too dim.. pun intended.. like you know how some light bulbs can be.. (un)screw them and throw them down the rubbish chute to where they belong. the trash.

don't read in the dark.. they're not good your eyes.

three quarter full ::

after reading this motivational book by dennis wee.. i was like wondering all my life.. have i really done my best for myself, for God. hm. for exams? for work?

honestly, i don't know whether is it work ethics or what.. or is it that normal.. or just feeling plain sian.. momentum for working happily doesn't seem to come very easily to me. was it just a lack of self discipline? or was it just because i didn't know what i want and therefore cannot find the motivation to do what i want?

sometimes aftre i prayed about it. i still feel quite demotivated.

somewhat these are still big questions marks in my mind, i mean thought demotivated moments. i need a holiday to clear them up baby! hahahaa.. :P okay okay.. its the holidays actually.

there're some issues which i want to feel strongly about.. but it ended up otherwise.. and for useless issues.. i think i can write essays and go on and on about it. hai...

its time to take some responsibility for my own life! Lord, i know you're looking into my life. injext life into it puhleasey?! hur hur~~

issues just get bigger ::

saw some of the wushu judges today. can't help feeling that the NSA itself is somewhat draconian in their way of handling things and over-runned by incompetent people.. esp towards promoting the art/sport itself, they're doing so little that ssc was hoping tat another perhaps commercial entity will step in and do the job for them. if not for the need to get judging license from them, they would have probably been phased out. for such a progressive and result oriented society like singapore. definitely.

anyway, scary stuff happened, chief coach was saying, after watching the routine he's cheorographed for one of the secondary school, the rival secondary school's teacher-in-charge blatantly tried to poach him into their school in front of their own coach! scandalous. it's quite sad to be honest.

i feel quite ready to chiong wushu also after exams. maybe go china in november? for training? but first, i must work really hard academically and work wise so that the holiday would be well deserved yah?

then maybe go for dec comp? or coach licensing? aiyah.. okay.. maybe.. at least there's some goal somewhere.

big issues happening also at inner workings of training practices. i have mixed feelings about this. on one hand.. there's really results to consider, on the other hand.. im worried about the emotional consequences which comes with it. no lah.. not me lah.. just wondering if friendship will be broken. anyway, not as if im like damn close to the person in question. i'd learnt to classify my friends properly.. who to be extra nice and thoughtful about and who not to. not that i do that delibrately.. but sometimes.. you know lah.. some people are just not that nice to you too in the first place. if i can't help them, i'll not hesitate to say no. and to the nice people, if i can't help them.. i'll also try to find someone who can help them.. get what i mean.. the length of trouble to take to help someone. but i wouldn't mind, if i really want to help.

but then again, after so many years i also don't see any improvements in the group of us, me.. so i did and do feel slightly indignant and cheated of my money/time/friendship in lieu of this matter.

from now on.. i shall be less vocal about my feelings on this. what i say probably can't help much also. we'll see how things go.. from now on.

life's a whirl ::

im trying to orientate myself in a whirlpool of exams, work, pay check, CMAs, PR-ing , karaoke and k-drama!! etc.. do bear with me a while..

think NUS's got this condusive environment to study. it's got a make-me-study enviroment comparatively to SP. everytime i go into SP, i feel like im going to some factory in tuas. the outlook somewhat look quite industrialised. maybe that's why they're a vocational institute. probably churning out people who would be familiar with the environment once they're out into the work force.

been watching a bit k-drama (under influence of my mom). well, i supposed that's probably the only feel-good influence i got from her. the actors and actresses are very charismatic. don't understand how come singaporean actors and actresses don't seem to be able to carry off that kinda aura? but can tell, k actresses and actors have the talents and some of them the looks, which make them very appealing. maybe its because our polys and uni they don't have dip and degrees in acting? therefore, our actors and actresses erm.. sad to say are quite sub standard? or maybe the their manager just wasn't as good? erm.. anyway, its hard for an outsider to comment whether they're going a good job or not.

anyway, honestly, i think fann wong is not bad. her what-kinda-award-i-should-get-next-year aside.. c'mon lah, that is like so long ago. she's good looking, pretty good acting skills and glam. okay what! i like zoe tay too, she's got this very down to earth persona. when she smiled at me during famine camp, i was totally star struck! okay. very unglam, but really! the effect was total! hm, i think her personality is really nice. acting also proven. achar!!

younger artistes.. i think joanna peh is promising. the rest erm.. okay lah. fiona xie.. so far i'd only heard negative comments on her and my impression on her wasn't all that wonder. no idea what, maybe its the sae she eludes. just not a very nice feeling. and she's only typically pretty i.e erm, no special features. not the exotic striking type.

anyway, my point being, korean actress and actors are the ones with the wow(!!) factor.

hur hur.. okay.. shall stop raving. time to hit the books.

plain dissed ::

hahaa.. its so not helping when valuair announced that they're launching a flight to chengdu for $360. so gian... and yagong's going to shanghai and then she's going to tour china..

these few days is really quite zonk out period for me. i studied hard, played hard and worked hard... and i felt really drained.. no no.. i must preserved energy to study!! :) quite upset over my schedule. but what to do.. sometimes work do come first. and before i know it.. all those past issues will start haunting me again.. look forward girl!! *tears hair* BUT, by the grace of God, he'll prevail in my life!! and make my life more easy yah? :) *yay*

anyway, am very happy for sonny!! cos he told me he's somewhat chosen to fly A-14. erm.. i think i got it right? sounds like some ship from star wards. A-14. anyway, its a fighter plane.. quite cool right. ahhahaa.. must get him to intro cute fighter pilots!!! ^^ *yay*

hahaha.. good to see him progressing well into his Airforce career. hope everything goes well for him!

little-black's been to the meeting with officials from wuzong over her torn liagament during training. and guess what the officials told her. "we might pay for the full operation cost, or half of it or maybe not at all. " which is equivalent to no answer. right? any idiot can tell you that.

when i heard that, i was like.. er, did i hear wrongly. did wuzong think little-black is still young and thus they're entitled to give her rubbish/nonsense as answers? i mean, what kind of answer is that? obviously they're trying to patronise her what.. its an obvious waste of time to be there. she hurt herself during training and of course they'll have to be responsible for that. talk about the lack of sportsmen/women is Singapore. which athlete would be willing to give their best for the nation while they get this kind of evasive attitude from their NSA? aren't they supposed to use their blain instead of their butt to think? they should have someone from SSC to monitor their style of governance which is clearly.. not up to standard. im horrified that such incidents should even be allowed to happen. its like going to tutor in maths and you did even bother to recap the formulas. bah! if this is going to continue. i think youngsters who aspire to be sportsmen in singapore should not even THINK about it. your future would be wrecked by another person's incompetence.

slow slow slow ::

today appears to be a very slow day. everything except me and what's happening to me seemed to me moving on and fast.. even the dial tone over the phone sounds like there's a very long interval after each tone. all the agents appeared to be speaking very slowly and sounded really muffled over the phone. how very irritating.. :( and they didn't picked up most of the time!!

hai.. work appears to be robbing me of my time to study. never felt so apprehensive about my exams before.

focus pocus dorkus ::

i'd opened up this blogging page for at least three times before i'd finally decided on something to write about.

well, actually, its almost the same thing as erm.. read the rest of the other posts. hahahah.. c'mon lah.. i know its a vicious cycle.. everything just repeats themselves.. esp issues. they're always the most unfortunate and neverending stories/cycles/shitholes/toiletbowl incidents.

anyway, something happy to report.. im quite back on track goal wise after talking to laopa and going to office today. talking to him is always a happy thing, cept sometimes.. i think he's too slick to trust with all those salesman talk. hahaha.. :P but its damn fun and crappy.. with chicken soup type of inspirational stories incorporated. you go laopa!! ;)

i think working in the office is quite ineteresting.. though i hardly go there. but i guess, i feel more productive there. spiritually even. good. there're great examples to follow in the office and no distractions. anyway, on my way home, i'd made all my plans and now i'd only fulfilled.. hmmhh.. some of it. erm. after this blogging session, i'll continue to gambate.

i got to study study study!!!! *oush* be more carefully about stuff i have to do... getting scatterbrainy and be more vigilant about my easily distracted mind. distracted by what... erm.. food lah.. being online, songs, talking to friends, other work... focus.. or poke me!! yikes.

im such a best friend!! hahaa.. my best guy friend is going on a date tmr with his crush! woah... and im dishing out advice!! =))))) ACHAR!