lost in a whirlpool of emotions ::

hm, back to our reality, [ i can't help feeling that the tsunami disaster is so surreal. ] im stuck in a mess of emotions and dunno-what-to-feels.

wushu juniors seemed to be distancing from one another. tis sad. considering they are the juniors i positively adore, 'teng'. but now, i find the bonds we share eroding [ or perhaps there weren't any bonds at all, save for a few. *shrugs* ] .

hm, i think i'd invested too much time in them and they don't seemed to appreciate it, therefore, im feeling very pissed off. eh, not that i want them to appreciate what i do for them. you get what i mean? how should i put it? at least don't give me attitude when just because you're in a bad mood or don't feel like humouring me? not as if i'd vent my anger/frustration on you. the below will sound quite personal. oyu have been warned.

if you don't agree on what others say, there's no need to make snide remarks or talk behind my back. i can honestly tell you that what i do for you guys, i do it because i want you all to feel better. so that you at least have something who is willing to hear your side of the story. and not stuck in some never-ending emotional pits. im sorry if all these helping turned out wrong, as much as you don't want it, i don't mean it to too.

unless you help yourself.. no one can help you. i did not patronise you. so don't you patronise me.

i know my limits and work within them and i don't practise wushu for the sake of setting an example to juniors alright? it is your onus whether you improve or not, not my duty.

lesson learnt : shuddup, move on and not waste time being nice to people who doesn't appreciate it.

im just plain tired of it.